American Idol 9 Finalists Compete - 4/6/11

This is American Idol

Someone needs to tell Steven Tyler he just looks like an old man trying too hard.

Songs of the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Scotty was probably hyperventilating until someone told him people like Johnny Cash and Hank Williams are in the HOF.

Who better to coach the contestants on R&R than Will.I.Am? Uh just about anyone. Unless they need someone to teach them how to avoid slipping in Fergie's crotch droppings on stage.

Jacob is up first. Probably a good decision to switch from Marvin Gaye to Michael Jackson. MJ is much more in Jacob's wheelhouse. Not surprisingly he knocked it out of the park.

I need to get to Randy. The hefty bag jacket is far less cool than a sweet cardigan.

I guess Gwen Stefani thinks Haley should dress like Stevie Nicks. Not a bad performance of "Piece of My Heart" but I thought it was overdone. The judges liked it way more than I did but that isn't anything new.

Steven looks like he's made a recent trip to the botox doctor.

I'm more excited for Casey this week than anyone else. I hope the black eye pea doesn't get in his head and screw him up. Thank god he changed songs. That looked like it was going to be a train wreck even by Idol standards. Slap that bass Casey. I don't love the performance. Interesting take on the song but if nothing else he made it his.

I like Lauren more each week. She's got the big voice to pull off Aretha and I like the way she's mellowed it out a bit. Just for the record, Gwen Stefani is a terrible stylist. Lauren sounds great and looks terrible.

That shot of Christian Slater was the creepiest moment in Idol history. It took me a few minutes to realize it wasn't Kato kaelin.

By far the worst song choice of the night is by James. Nice job of not spotlighting your best asset. He could have chosen any number of slower songs that would have featured his voice better. Not a bad performance but a bad choice.

Jennifer is wrong with her assessment. What a fucking goofball. I don't get the crying. I don't get how you write your own version of a song either. Maybe I just don't get James.

My wife is obsessed with figuring out who all on the show is gay.

You have no idea how excited I am to see Scotty do Rock. Here's a surprise. His head is cocked to the side. Whenever Scotty performs you have a choice to make. You can take him serious by just listening and not watching the screen or you can take in the complete cheese by watching him perform. The hand wave was completely bizzarre and the two handing the mic still freaks me out but I probably enjoyed Scotty more tonight than any other time of the competition.

Pia is coming up. If you need to take a nap here's your chance. I have to admit I didn't pay a lot of attention to Pia's singing. I was too distracted by what has to be one of the 3 worst jumpsuits ever made. It takes something tremendously bad to make a body like Pia's look dumpy and fat. Congrats Gwen.

I believe I told you people last week that Pia lacked the ability to do the simplest dance moves. She can study the mount rushmore of dancing and she'll never have that talent.

I don't know what the rest of you think but Hanna looks like a damn good movie.

I'm calling my shot right here. Before I even see Stefano perform, I'm predicting he goes home this week. I hated the beginning but brought it home nicely. I really can't stand Stefano's cheesiness.

Wow. That was Paul's best performance of the competition. I didn't know he had it in him to put it out like that. Paul should never perform again without his guitar. It anchors him on stage and keeps him moving forward instead of falling all over the stage.

Probably the toughest bottom 3 decision of the season but here goes

James
Stefano
Casey. This one really pains me but the other contestants took bigger chances.